She said that she could heel his Internet addiction.
He should have asked her to spell that.

Best All-Around Athletes in Sports

It's debatable, within some circles, as to which sport has the best all-around athletes.

Some wrong-thinking fans will argue it's basketball players who, being so tattoo laden, must run up and down the court, bobbing and weaving so as to avoid other tattoo laden opponents, while dribbling a ball without taking too many steps between bounces, only to arrive at some distance close enough to the basket where they sometimes are even forced to jump off the ground in an attempt to throw the ball through a hoop and net.

Others on the wrong side of accurate evaluation attempt to support that certain positions on the football field require the best all-around athletic ability. Come on! These players only play half of the game, at best, while taking a break between each and every play along with commercial breaks, yardage measurements, multiple time outs, and many other play stopping rules. Sure they're encased in pounds of protective gear, but they're not alone in sports requiring such an added burden. Plus, any sport which has the word "punt", yet alone using it to describe a planned play, can't even be seriously considered as having the best all-around athletes.

Baseball? One word. "Bonds" Enough said.

Sports where anything carries the athlete are also automatically tossed out as having the best all-around athletes. Bikes, cars, horses, luge, bull riding, curling or snipe shooting, are all disqualified.

Swimmers are a tough bunch, no doubt (with the exception of synchronized swimming which isn't so much a sport as it is a demonstration). They hold a top position in the overall best athlete competition. They'd win the whole thing if they could finish a race without taking a breath. They should work on that.

Golf? Right. Fun to play, but "no" in this competition.

The only other sport I've heard argued, except for the obvious winner to be named, as having outstanding athletes is mountain climbing, but then it was limited to one individual. Granted, he successfully climbed and descended Mt. Everest after losing both his legs to sever frostbite in an earlier attempt, thereby earning himself honorable mention, but alas, not the coveted best all-around athlete in sports.

Therefore, by process of elimination, if by no other method, this leaves us with hockey players being the best overall athletes in sports today. They go and stop just as fast as they can, while playing both offense and defense with few breaks between shift rotations, short rests between periods, sudden DEATH overtimes, while chasing a frozen piece of rubber which occasionally bounces off their slightly protected bodies, while being slammed into the boards and slamming others into the boards, fist fighting to resolve on-ice disputes, all without even a beer. These are athletes. They need strong legs, hard heads, loose gloves, no fear, stamina, great lungs, quick reflexes, high pain thresholds and good dentists. These are by far the best all-around athletes in sports.

Anyone that says otherwise is wrong.

Stanley Cup, baby. The most coveted trophy in sports. Coveted by the best all-around athletes in sports.

Did I mention that the winners are hockey players?

Newest member of the household was disunreconnected today. Need the "heat pump" portion of this baby right now?.... Not so much. The cool is cool, though.

Google always puts a cute little graphic on their logo for all the different holidays.
Except for Memorial Day?
Nothing?
What's up with that?
Sucks to be them.

Memorial Day.
Thank you for my freedom and rights.
A debt I can never repay, but will never dismiss.

Bear Prayer

"Please bless the meal I am about to eat and protect me from choking on the camera this time."

We were going to have some fun on the lake this holiday weekend, but nooooooo.

Who are you?

What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

hat tip:

http://curmudgeonlyskeptical.blogspot.com/

Funny Drudge link

By BONNA de la CRUZStaff WriterPublished:
Wednesday, 05/24/06

A Hillary Clinton rally drew critics of President Bush, nonpartisan voters looking for a strong leader, and people who want to elect a female president.

About 20 people attended the Tuesday event.

Twenty?! Could only draw or find 20 non-partisan voters looking for an anyone-but-Bush, strong female leader? I'd have bet lots of money there would have upwards to thirty.
You go, Hillary!

Tech Support!

Now what?

If you keep doing that, your eyes are going to stay way, young man.

Toughest sumbitch on the planet

Some people apparently make more out of life than do others.

New Zealand mountaineer Mark Inglis became the first double amputee to reach the summit of Everest, despite snapping a leg, as seen in the photo, his wife Anne confirmed 16 May. Inglis was a mountain rescue guide when he and fellow climber Phil Doole had both legs amputated below the knee after suffering frostbite in 1982 when trapped in an ice cave for 14 days on Mount Cook, New Zealand's highest peak and since then, Inglis has taken on a number of challenges and succeeded -- ranging from legless mountaineer and ski guide to research scientist after earning an honours degree in human biochemistry. He is also a leading winemaker and cycling silver medallist at the Sydney Paralmypics.(AFP)

Let me get this straight.
You want to send 6,000 NG troops down to the Mexican border, to cause law suits to be filed by the Mexican government (probably with the full assistance of the ACLU lawyers) if those troops so much as detain an ILLEGAL alien, while granting not-really-amnesty to a brazillion others already here?
Is that about right?
Well there's a whole bunch of us in fly-over country who are about sick and tired of this political posturing and do-nothing, hide-the-problem-under-the-rug, lame excuse for leadership in government that the whole damn bunch of you in Washington, DC have sunken into. How about we just fix the damn problem?
I know it means higher prices for meat and roofs and landscaping and houses and taxi rides and eye-glasses, but COME ON!

Iron Eyes Cody read this blog and a tear rolled down his cheek, having thought he had once already gotten his message across about trash.

Her husband, not happy with her mood swings, bought her a mood ring so he would be able to monitor her moods. When she is in a good mood, it turns green. When she's in a bad mood, it leaves a big red mark on his forehead.

What's for dinner on a bachelor weekend?

Mudders Day is Sunday, don't forget.

Z. Moussaoui gotta owie?

5/13/06
The Opener!

Attention whore?

NEW YORK -
Stunt artist David Blaine was pulled from an aquarium by divers Monday nearly two minutes short of his goal of setting a world record for holding his breath underwater.
Blaine was trying to free himself from chains and handcuffs while bidding to break the record of 8 minutes, 58 seconds for holding one's breath underwater. The stunt, following a weeklong endurance challenge underwater, was televised live by ABC.
With Blaine's face contorted in pain and bubbles rising to the surface, divers went in to release him from the chains and pull him out. Blaine held his breath for 7:08.

Some friendly advice

An Open Letter To Iran From Uday And Qusay Hussein

Dear President Ahmedinejad and people of Iran,
Maybe... just maybe mind you... you should rethink your outwardly bellicose stance towards America. Just a suggestion. Good luck whatever you decide.
Sincerely,
Uday and Qusay

http://www.thenoseonyourface.com/

Don't forget!

Tomorrow's No Pants Day.

Surprise your boss.

Snail invasion!
Everybody walk for your lives!


Invasive Snail Found in Minn. Harbor

DULUTH, Minn. May 2, 2006 (AP)- A small, spiral-shaped snail that clones itself and is native to New Zealand has been discovered in Duluth-Superior Harbor and the St. Louis River estuary, raising concerns about the impact of another invasive species.

The snail, called the New Zealand mudsnail, is only about as large as a peppercorn when fully grown. But one snail and its offspring can generate hundreds of thousands of clones each year.

In some Western states, the mudsnail has displaced native insects, snails and other invertebrates that are important food for fish.

The mudsnails were first found in Idaho's Snake River in 1987, and have affected Rocky Mountain trout streams. They were first spotted in the Great Lakes in Lake Ontario in 1991.

More than 100 mudsnails were collected last fall in Duluth by Environmental Protection Agency researchers. The discovery, announced Monday, is the first finding of the tiny snail in Minnesota and Wisconsin waters.

Researchers suspect that they were carried into the Great Lakes via ship ballast water.

http://abcnews.go.com/Technology/wireStory?id=1915583